Woman Survives Week in Wilderness by Sucking Water From Her Hair

okay so i just read this story on what i think is called lemondrop and it said, no shit, that a woman, a 68 year old woman, survived 5 days — broken ribs, broken vertebrae, a whole slam shit of stuff, and… after her car rolled down a ravine she managed to crawl on her face — all while thinking of her family — in order to stay alive, WHILE — get this — SUCKING ON HER LONG HAIR TO KEEP FROM BEING DEHYDRATED.
okay, color me cynical, but i gotta say first and foremost, there is no way i’m gonna crawl 400 miles facedown, i would rather be eaten by a grizzly bear than crawl on my face for 5 days and 400 miles. i am not a woman who has an abundance of self confidence to begin with, so this face down crawl would just ruin it for me. and the other thing, the whole point of this story, i have real short hair, and i’m betting that the moisture from my hair would last, oh i don’t know, 3 hours tops.
this is such a huge boom for long hair!
not fair one bit.
but i have to say if i were driving in a desert (which in and of itself is so friggin’ unrealistic) i would make sure that i have enough hair products to keep me alive for a good ten days, two weeks. fuck food, i’m going for hair straightening gel and mousse, and all sorts of pomade.
i can’t even go to the crawling on the face scenario, i’m sorry. i just can’t.
but brava, brava to this woman, for a a) crawling facedown. and b) using lock in moisturizer.
so here’s to all hair products that lock in and keep in moisture, who knew they would also double as a life saver.
un-fucking-believable what we take for granted. i personally will never look at l’oreal in the same way ever again.
Because, well … i’m so friggin’ worth it.

face-up or face-down.

Category: Uncategorized 2 comments »

2 Responses to “Woman Survives Week in Wilderness by Sucking Water From Her Hair”

  1. Frances
    September 28th, 2009 at 2:17 am

    Ok, as another short haired person out there, let me offer a solution:
    arm hair! Perhaps if we start using products on our arm hair we could survive on it! Not only would volumized and moisture locked arm hair look, well, awesome, but it could be a life saver!

    My next thought is “Oh lord, please don’t let this become the new dieting fad…”

    <3
  2. Debbie
    September 30th, 2009 at 5:06 pm

    Amy, ABSOLUTELY HILARIOUS!

    … I have a serious question for you. I did a little blurb on my blog about your book (Marrying George Clooney) and I think someone may have played a cruel joke on me and left a rather awe inspiring comment on my blog and signed it …. love, amy ferris. Was this really you? Please let me know … because if it was, I need my heart to start beating again … if it wasn’t, I need to find out who to kill.

    Seriously.

    Thanks so much!

    Debbie Nunez

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