Marrying George Clooney

okay. so i’m driving to washington dc from pennsylvania where i live. for the record, i much prefer being the passenger, particularly when ken is driving so i have someone to vent with, at towards. call me crazy. i love being the passenger, it’s passive-aggressive and i feel, while not really – like i am holding the wheel. or at the very least gripping the wheel. so here i am tooling along doing just fine when all of a sudden, boom i come to a fork. do i go east or west? big question. one will take me to washington, one will take me back to where i began. i am stuck. i pull into the triangular median, an illegal thing to do, i know. i think. yes, i’ll call ken, mu one lifeline. i call him. he answers, i ask: hon, do i go east or west. he hems and haws. gee, maybe, well, ooooh no no, weher are you? hey ken, listen i have a bunch of cars beginning to pile behind me, you gotta think fast, east or west, i’m beginning to hear the game show music, the clock ticking, slumdog millionaire flashes in my minds eye. EAST go east amy. you sure, you 100% sure ken caus ethis could fuck me up, nope you east, i’m positive. okey dokey.
i go east and i feel (intuitively) that this is so not the right way i should be going. it feels wrong, backwards, out of sink and sorts and i decide to get of fthe highway at the very first exit and see if someone who has a better sense of direction can help me with this vehicular question. ah hah, a toll booth. i pull into the EZ pass lane, whip out my ex pass like it’s a PI badge, and ask the toll person if he can lead me back to 476 south. yeah sure, you gotta make a u-turn and go back 4 iles, and there it is, and then take i-95, that’ll take you straight to washington. thanks, i say, i got lost/ hge says; really, you got a GPS? I say, not I got a K.E.N.

for now on, michael will be my lifeline, he’s very good with highway, bi-ways, freeways, back roads and east and west.