Marrying George Clooney

i’m pretty sure this all began with a prayer. and as a person who believes wholeheartedly in the power of prayer, i write this with an open heart and no judgement. (oh, good god, that is so not true….)
this is where it all comes together.
my friend has been praying for a ‘good 14 inches’ (*okay, maybe that’s an exaggeration…) for close to a year. she was married, divorced, dating …. single for a while. she wants a man. she wants a good solid kind funny sexually active man. there has been screaming up to the heavens, hands waving in a circle, drumming, two days of silence, bartering, offering to be good and kind and altruistic, giving up ‘family’ thanksgivings in place of a food pantry at the homeless shelter.
she has been praying to the gods of the sun and the moon, to jesus and buddha, to the gods at bliss and lancome, michael j. fox, and the entire tibetan community. she has put adds in newspapers, craigslist, and even on match.com, j-date and e-entertainment.
“I want love and kindness, and funny, and a good heart and i am a very sexual creature…”
and then she would say to herself, NOT OUT-LOUD, OR IN WRITING, “…and yes, i really, really, really want a good 14 inches.” (*disclosure… yep, exaggeration..)

hmmm.

okay, who is looking out their window right now? who on the eastcoast is staring out their window? whatdya see?

i see 22 inches and counting.

seems to me she is getting a good 14 inches (* yep yep yep exaggeration).

the problem is we’re all getting it. 14, 15, 16, 18….24 inches. non stop.

this, right here, is such a lesson in prayer.
when you’re vague and afraid and don’t want to ask the gods of the sun and the moon and e-trade for what it is you want for whatever reason; embarrassment, fear, doubt, undeserving, not good enough  … you get a frickin’ snow storm.

when you’re specific, when you can ask for exactly what you want, when you declare THIS IS WHAT I WANT, this is what i need , this is for ME THIS HAS MY NAME ON IT … then, you get the snowman.