fearless flying

i’m on a campaign. i started it after i talked with barbara hannah grufferman (my fearless, gorgeous brilliant new friend & amazing author!)
i often think of myself as bold and audacious and even– on some days — awfully courageous. i speak my mind, i say fuck you often, and i am not very shy when it comes to expressing my opinions. but that doesn’t necessarily make me fearless. i’m comfortable speaking my mind. i’m very uncomfortable asking for what i want. i’m comfortable saying fuck you to someone who hurts me or attacks me verbally, i am not comfortable saying “that’s unacceptable, you can’t treat me like that.” i am comfortable giving someone else praise, and offering them the floor, i am wholly uncomfortable being the center of attention even at an event that is in fact revolving around me. i am comfortable picking up the phone and praising someone about a friend’s book, or film or CD, but i am profoundly uncomfortable about pushing my own creativity, art, work… writing.
so yesterday i decided to start a FEARLESS @ 50 campaign. do something everyday that scares the hell out of me, or at the very least something i have put off, tucked away, let slide, given up on…

and just for clarification sake, i am not going to bungee jump. that doesn’t go under the category of fearless for me, that goes under “fiercely, uncontrollably bouncing up and down in mid air while being somewhat attached to a rigged device.”

but for those of you who put bungee jumping on your list… i say JUMP.

and as i reminded myself yesterday, it isn’t about getting a yes or a no … it’s about taking an action, doing something that scares me.

so, here’s to us women who are standing on the edge of the cliff, looking down and wondering…

i’m here to tell you – everyone of us — we’re all gonna fly.

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One Response to “fearless flying”

  1. LyndaJean Henzie

    I feared the dark…and spiders. So I went on a VisionQuest, spending 4 days fasting with no tent or fire; with just a journal in the Vermont wilderness. Throwing myself out in trust that I would be embraced. I was. I met a moose and a black bear. I danced by the lake singing with the loons. I shared my grove of birch trees with a barred owl. I am no longer afraid of the dark or spiders. I also embraced me, my art, my middle-aged menopausal self. That was 5 yrs ago. I feared losing my Dad to the cancer inside of him. I worked with the hospice caregivers; I spent hours and minutes and seconds listening and speaking with him. I was there at the very end of his journey…and I was no longer afraid; I had been given such gifts. That was 2 yrs ago. So, here I am: an artist, a potter, my mom’s caregiver, an empty-nester, a woman almost at the end of menopause…and married to an amazing man. Dare to not fear…fearless @53!

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