the wizard of dr. oz

has anyone ever seen a tornado up close?
i mean really up close.
i mean, like right in front of you: spinning & twirling & spinning faster & twirling faster & creating havoc and moving so fast … so fast everything is flattened in it’s wake.
everything.
a whole frickin’ mess.

i saw one this morning. everything was calm (hence the calm before the storm saying) and quiet. all was peaceful, and then this:

“where are my black boxer shorts?”
“geez, i don’t know. maybe in the wash?”

and then it hit like a mofo. tornado ken hit at 9:47am.

who the fuck knew one pair of underwear could cause such a tirade?

WHERE ARE MY BLACK BOXER SHORTS?

gee hon, i don’t fucking know. maybe the wash?

not the right answer.

the damage, the flinging, the searching, the tossing …

yep. the wash, they were in the wash.

and now i need a cleaning crew, hazmat suits and all.

oh, god… someone … please, intervene.

Category: Uncategorized 2 comments »

2 Responses to “the wizard of dr. oz”

  1. kristine
    April 1st, 2010 at 11:37 am

    Are those the black boxer shorts you bought at TARGET, by any chance?
  2. Debbie
    April 1st, 2010 at 2:59 pm

    first you must tell me … are you a good witch … or a bad witch?

    Signed,
    Glinda

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