what if kathryn bigelow directed SEX IN THE CITY PART 2…


well, for starters, it would not be set in abu dhabi.
it would be set in iraq.
all costumes and clothing would be khaki. how sexy & cool is that?
khaki & pearls, khaki & heels, khaki & frye boots, khaki & flats, khaki & sleeveless white t-shirts, or tease as i like to call them, white tease.
khaki & khaki.

carrie & mr. big (aka john) are in the midst of a huge life decision: should she carry twins or the new “holy shit cow this is so expensive” prada bag, which yes, yes… will cost an arm & a leg & a kidney.
time to get away and not blog for a week, after all one doesn’t have to share everything with their readership.

charlotte is going through a major midlife crisis – “should she or shouldn’t she” have an affair with a man she met while walking her dogs. a handsome republican jew who is thinking seriously of leaving Goldman Sachs, becoming a socialist & opening a store on madison avenue called trotsky’s toys.
she too decides it’s time to get away, rethink life. for her it would be yet another set of dishes & silverware.

miranda is having another major “oh, fuck steve and his childlike baby unattractive behavior” moment. clearly they’re on a different life path. he will always be a goofy kid at heart, and she is probably a lesbian.
oh, yes, time to get away.

and of course, there’s samantha. while in an elevator filled with gorgeous sexy young men, she has a “my god it’s so fucking hot down here,” meltdown, and that’s all the reason she needs.

“hey girls, i know, let’s go to iraq… men & war, how fucking sexy is that?”

while in iraq, samantha falls madly in love with an iraqi war veteran amputee, and finally grows the fuck up, realizing that one only needs a sense of humor to get through life.

carrie has a “breakfast at epiphany’s” moment, and realizes that carrying anything, absolutely anything, can be a burden.

miranda realizes that she is a lesbian, but only fashionably, not sexually.

charlotte doesn’t know what to do. she’s completely at odds, confused and remains tormented, seeking comfort with a group of iraqi children and finally at the eleventh hour realizes that she needs no man, but she wants her children to grow up to be multi-lingual.

All girls come home with a renewed sense of self worth, along with a new wardrobe: Eileen Fisher.
Bye-bye spandex.
Samantha becomes a militant feminist and starts a group called: WOMEN FOR MEN FOR LIMBS.
Miranda and Steve both become lesbians and share clothes.
Carrie and Mr. Big decide not to have children, “adopt a highway” instead. a win-win.
Charlotte becomes a Socialist. Giving up material wealth, and Purum.
All four women pool their money, open a sushi bar & grill on the lower east-side and call it: IRAQ & ROLL.

“and they lived happily ever … after taxes, after sales, after all…”

Category: Uncategorized 2 comments »

2 Responses to “what if kathryn bigelow directed SEX IN THE CITY PART 2…”

  1. Vickie Stahl

    Love it! Although I must admit I do own all 6 seasons of the series and yes I did buy the first movie because I didn’t want to break up the set, I think you should pitch Sex in The City Part 3 when the gals have fallen into the reality of designer clothes not covering up the muffin top, menopausal flashes that cause the makeup to bleed right off your face and breasts that sag so low that if you do get on your knees to perform any type of job, you’ll probably pinch the fucking things.

    Thanks for making my laugh at myself…

  2. Debbie

    You’re a damn genius! too funny Amy!


Leave a Reply


Back to top