lillian was older. wiser. gorgeous. smart. funny. kind. witty. a real broad. she loved fully. she was my friend bob’s mom. and she was, yes, my friend. she lived with them. their home makes my home look like a closet. not a small cramped closet, but still… a walk in … a big walk in, one you could actually sit in and put your shoes on in.
lillian lived a grand life. grand in the sense she had much joy, much sorrow, much happiness, much sadness. much soul. she buried a son from an illness that ravaged him and she carried him in her heart forever. she held on to those she loved fiercely. she was a mother hen when it came to her family. she married a few times and from what i can gather, loved and liked them both very much. she treated folks with dignity and respect and said what was on her mind. in other words, no bullshit. there might have been some silence, but no bullshit.
hers was a quick death. although truth be told, she had not been feeling well for a while. but still, much to the grand delight of her family, she did not suffer. SHE DID NOT SUFFER, and so therefore THEY DID NOT SUFFER.
that too could be one definition of having lived a grand & generous life. at the end one doesn’t suffer.

lillian loved and liked her family, she liked them plenty. she liked having them around, and having meals with them and she especially liked her grand children.
she was a thoughtful woman, and her death was as thoughtful as her life.
bob was able to gather his family from all points, to be with her at the end. from san francisco to virginia, so that at the time of her death everyone was here.
perfect timing.
some people have it down. some folks never spend an inordinate amount of time on the phone with telemarketers, or credit card companies, or automated people saying NO I MEANT NEWARK, not NEWKIRK.

some people get right to the heart of things.
i liked lillian. she was one of those women.

she died just like she lived. with dignity and beauty and possibly with her hair done, and with those she loved around her. and while it was her heart that failed, i would wager that at the end it was a heart filled with all the love intact.

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3 Responses to “a friend died MAY SHE TRULY REST IN PEACE”

  1. Hollye Dexter

    What a beautiful tribute Amy.
    She sounds like an amazing woman. she kind of sounds like you.
    May we all live so brilliantly.


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  3. ellyn

    beautiful, her family must be proud. RIP, Lillian.

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