happy birthday aaron

today is my nephews birthday.
we don’t speak.
(per jane’s comment – thank you jane — clarification here: WE DON’T SPEAK OFTEN, HARDLY EVER)
too much water under the proverbial ‘family’ bridge, but still, he’s now 30.

and i love him.

i wanted to wish him well.
& happy
& joy
& peace
& a life filled with much self love and less self-doubt
a life of truth
not someone else’s truth of who you are, or an expectation of you.
your truth.
a life filled with grand magic & miracles. small & large.
a life with grand abundance – i don’t just mean cash, or financial wealth – but real true abundance, the ones that show up in friends, who hang tough, love hard, keep holding. stay grounded. that’s real true wealth. that other wealth buys you shit that you think will get you bonus points & friends. newsflash: very very temporary.
be good to yourself.
try not to lie.
speak YOUR heart. not everyone’s gonna get it – you – anyway.
be YOU.
all of you.
fuck em if they don’t like you.
chances are some won’t like you even if you jump through thousands of hoops.
jump through the HOOPS you WANNA jump through.
they’re your hoops. your dreams.
30 is cool.
it’s grownup,
it’s grownup time.
you fought. you broke open hard, you worked through demons.
embrace the beauty, the magic, the out right miracle of knowing it will appear if you fight for it, deeply want & desire it. and it will be bigger and better and more than you hoped for.
patience. i wish you patience.
and if you can’t muster patience i wish for you a big comfortable mushy chair, that sort of chair that envelopes and hugs you, and you realize, holy shit man, i could be on a straight wooden chair…waiting…waiting… and that would suck. cushy chairs are much more comfortable.
i wish you great comfort. think huge, don’t let the demons win EVER, and know, really truly know, that you can be and do anything.
you don’t need permission to be great, you just might need a teeny little itsy bitsy shove. that’s all.
happy birthday, aaron.
it is a grand day.

Category: Uncategorized 5 comments »

5 Responses to “happy birthday aaron”

  1. Madge Woods

    Hope he sees it. Sorry he doesn’t talk to you. You are too good, his loss but apparently yours as well.

  2. Jane

    I’m throwing a flag, Amy. Disclaimer: Obviously I have NO idea what water is under what bridge BUT to say you don’t speak to someone for whatever reason and then say ‘but I love him’ and then go on and on and on wishing all these wonderful things for him…I don’t know. It just doesn’t make sense to me. May I refer you back to that ‘truth’ column the other day. And the “Silence is NOT golden” column. Remember? How can you say you love someone but not talk to them because of ‘too much water under the bridge.’

  3. Amy Ferris

    GREAT COMMENT. what i should have written: i don’t speak to him often … it’s very complicated and we’ve tried – we’ve really tried, and when i say we don’t talk, what i should have written is that it’s really hard for us to talk, and so we haven’t in a long time … and i thank you for that flag and your honesty – and what i’m going to do … is put in a DISCLAIMER, per your suggestion. THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU!

  4. Hollye Dexter

    this is gorgeous and the reason why i love you.

  5. Jane

    Thank YOU, Amy. SO much better now! (Picking up my flag, putting it back in my pocket…but I’m watching you!) ;0)

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