Comments on: gotta have friends…

By: gail m forrest

gail m forrest — Wed, 09 Dec 2009 19:00:21 +0000

You’ve got to dump the depressing bashing friends. I’ve dumped a few women in my day and am happier for it. Why why why feel bad about yourself via someone else when self bashing is more kind and subtle. Just let the phone calls get farther and farther apart and soon poof! she’s gone. That’s my methodology and quite successful I might add. Purge yourself from these toxic girls/mother reminders, I say!

By: Moonkwean

Moonkwean — Fri, 04 Dec 2009 11:58:34 +0000

Friends are the sisters we wished we had. I have had a core of friends for a very long time. We each have other friends who become our extended sister family.
Yes, the ones that drain us, may be our friends for awhile, however, they must go.
Unless you are that friend, then of course that is fine!

By: Robyn

Robyn — Tue, 17 Nov 2009 03:20:09 +0000

Love Debbie’s comment. Have the exact same feeling about my sister. Amy, just as I read this I thought of a possible reason we do this. Maybe we hold on to friends because we don’t believe in abundance. Maybe we think if we let this friend go, we’ll never get another one. And if this person likes us, we better hold on to them, cause hell… it’s not easy to get people to like us… and we should be eternally grateful for their attention no matter how negative. And maybe it’s time to get the hell over that!!

By: Frances

Frances — Tue, 17 Nov 2009 02:34:17 +0000

It is such a weird trap to fall in to, to have such strange friendships with people that don’t really benefit us. I try to look on the bright side though, and think that at some level picking those people who aren’t very great to be our friends is important to our growth. And it helps us recognize it when really great friends come along!
I love you and miss you!

By: co

co — Mon, 16 Nov 2009 22:12:18 +0000

your friends should ask you how you are, tell you how thin you are, and then check when you are going through your closet. Well, you lost so much weight that gorgeous dress looks unbecoming and we can’t have that!

By: Margaret Andrews

Margaret Andrews — Mon, 16 Nov 2009 21:22:27 +0000

I think it doesn’t even occur to us that breaking up with a friend is even an option. As if it’s a funny notion. You can only break up with lovers and that’s it. So instead of saying, “OK, Mildred, I think we’re through here,” we just sort of screen our calls and try to let it die naturally. And just like with lovers, it hardly ever works. They get mad at you and stalk you and “Why aren’t you returning my calls?” and GAHHH!!!!!

So anyway…I like your outfit. Is that cashmere?

By: Debbie

Debbie — Sun, 15 Nov 2009 02:01:34 +0000

i have really good friends, but it took me a lot of years and therapy to start picking them better. however, i have a sister that drains me, makes me feel horrible about myself and has been punishing me for the last 20 years. Basically, she’s a ton of work to be around so i have well defined boundaries regarding her. it makes me sad because she is my sister, but it’s either that or having no relationship with her at all, and somehow i couldn’t imagine not having a relationship with her at all. Sick huh.

XXXOOO
Deb